Barth’s Bus Stories: 420

20 Apr

[Five women get on the bus, sitting near each other in a group. All of them white, for what it’s worth.]

busfeet2Woman1: Where are you going?

Woman2: Fridley to get Xanax.

Woman1: Ernie taking you?

Woman2: Yes, he’s driving me. He’s charging me for gas.

Woman1: Charging you for gas?

Woman2: I know.

Woman1: That isn’t right.

Woman2: Fridley’s pretty far I guess. I can’t get my money without the Xanax and I can’t my Xanax without the money and I can’t get to Fridley without Ernie.

[Suddenly all five women stop chatting and look out the window at a big group of people standing in a dense circle.]

Woman3: What’s going on there?

[Man gets on bus]

Woman3: [to Man] What’s going on out there? [points at group]

Man: It’s National Weed-smoking Day. They’re handing out pipes filled with weed.

[Woman4 and Woman5 dart off the bus before the driver can pull away.]

Woman3: What? National…wait…National what??

Man: April 20! It’s National Weed-smoking Day.

Woman3: [breathless] NATIONAL WEED-SMOKING DAY?!

Man: Those guys are gonna march on the capitol later today, they told me.

Woman3: I love me some Barack Obama! [Heads for the front exit.]

Bus driver: Don’t get off, Ginger. You just got on.

Woman3: They’re handing out free weed in pipes back there! It’s National Weed-smoking Day! It’s all legal now!

Bus driver:  Weed ain’t legal! You take the free marijuana and the cops just gonna take you to jail that much faster.

Woman3: Aw, man. [Disgusted. Sits back down.] Obama.

2 Responses to “Barth’s Bus Stories: 420”

  1. farmerkhaiti April 20, 2015 at 10:49 pm #

    haaaaaaaaaaa!!!

  2. missteatree April 21, 2015 at 6:26 am #

    This is hilarious!

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